On account of my reduced/failing mobility I have a lot of things delivered. I’m not happy about it, my carbon footprint is higher than the average but “nipping to the shop” is an almighty ordeal. Plus I have a lot of things on subscription as you get discounts that way – boring things like washing capsules and poo bags for the dog mostly.

The problem with that though is dealing with couriers. Couriers get paid per drop so they absolutely want to make those deliveries. As a result, my doorbell rings most days and I move really fucking slow so I usually shout out “I’m just coming” and luckily most regular drivers know to either wait a minute or two (I’m never further than 5m from the front door) or my favourite drivers don’t even bother knocking they just pop the parcel outside my back door and close the gate. Saving me from struggling to the door at all ❤️

Occasionally a new or unfamiliar driver will bring me a parcel though and I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve had to tell them off for ringing the doorbell multiple times in the space of one minute creating a cacophony of noise from the dog who’s going off his fucking box! Or worse still I’ve had a couple ring the doorbell and not 30 seconds later they’re hammering on the door like there’s a bloody fire or something! And that’s just rude 🤬 so they get told in no uncertain terms. My favourite phrase being “I’m disabled not FUCKING DEAF!!!” Which has always garnered profuse apology on their part but it’s still not ok to bang on anyone’s door like that!

I now have a video doorbell so I can either tell them to wait or, if they don’t need a signature then just to leave it and I’ll come and grab it in a sec. Does make my life much easier and less stressful. Some, however, don’t even wait long enough for my phone to connect with the doorbell for me to talk to them!! Which is literally seconds! I don’t know how many people in this world can make it to their door within three seconds but courier drivers obviously expect that to be the case 🙄 

So for any courier drivers out there, we of all people appreciate you bringing us the things that you bring us but PLEASE wait more than 30 seconds before knocking again!